A Choice of Secrets Read online

  As he spoke, a thought hit me and I saw my chance.

  “My lord,” I said. “There will be wounded people at Chastain. My mother sent a box of medicines and I can quickly put together some bandages. If you take me with you, I can work as a healer.”

  “Take you?”

  “Yes, I would be safe riding at your side, under your protection.” Guilt rose inside as I watched his eyes light up at the prospect of me riding beside him and needing his protection. But I didn’t stop. “This is not a rushed or dangerous mission to cut off any raiders. It is a well-planned mission to go and offer food and aid. I could be of help to you.”

  I knew exactly what I was doing, appealing to his love for me and painting an image of the two of us working together to help his people.

  Still, he hesitated. “What of Chloe? She may need you.”

  “The child will not come this early and we will be gone only a matter of days. I would like to help and the people of Chastain will be in need of a skilled healer.”

  Julian’s head swiveled back and forth between us, and as if he were growing anxious. Then his gaze settled on me. He knew what I was doing: Getting Christophe away until the child was born and some time had passed.

  “My lord,” he said, sounding deferential. “You would not risk Lady Nicole needlessly? Surely, this village must have its own healer.”

  “Not like me,” I answered and then looked to Christophe. “And I will be safe with you.”

  Slowly, he nodded and turned to the wet lieutenant. “Take a boat back to shore and inform the captain that Lady Nicole and I will join him at the barracks before dark. We’ll leave with the contingent in the morning.”

  “Yes, my lord.”

  Relief flooded through me. But as the lieutenant turned to leave, I froze.

  Mildreth stood in the archway. She’d been listening to every word. Her gaze moved first to Julian and then to me. Then she turned to the young lieutenant and gave an order, “Leave us, but don’t go far. Remain within calling distance.”

  After glancing at Christophe, he nodded. “Yes, my lady.”

  She waited for him to leave. I didn’t like this. What was she up to?

  “Brother,” she said slowly to Christophe. “Send Captain Fáuvel to assist the people of Chastain. You cannot leave the keep.”

  Confused, Christophe shook his head. “Why not?”

  “Because your wife will give birth at any time, and you need to be here when that happens.”

  He walked toward her, speaking gently. “It’s all right, Mildreth. Chastain needs me now and Chloe will not deliver the child until mid-spring.”

  “She will give birth soon and the child will be fully formed.”

  I could feel my hands going cold. Mildreth did know. She was not guessing.

  Christophe halted in mid-step. “What are you saying?”

  “I’m saying the child is not yours.” Gesturing to Julian, she said calmly, “It is his. I’ve had him followed and I’ve had him watched. Several conversations between him and your wife have been overheard and reported back to me.”

  “Gossip gained from ears pressed to keyholes?” Julian broke in. “And you’ve walked in here to tell false whispers as fact?”

  His voice was steady. I had to give him that.

  But the coldness in my hands was spreading up into my arms. Could Julian not see what was happening here?

  Mildreth continued speaking to Christophe as if Julian was not in the room. “He’s been attempting to blackmail Lady Chloe by threatening to tell you the truth if she does not give him several family heirlooms of great value.”

  For the first time since her entrance, Christophe appeared to waver, as if actually listening to her words.

  “Your wife has been deceiving you since the moment of your marriage,” Mildreth went on. “And what’s more”—she pointed to me—“this one has been helping her. Why do you think Nicole is so eager to take you away from home? How long might she be able to keep you away? Long enough for the child to be born and to feed, to grow pink and rosy as babies do, so that you would not question its good heath.” She paused. “Trust me, brother. The child will come at any time and it will be fully formed at birth.”

  How awful she made Chloe and me sound, schemers and deceivers.

  Christophe was breathing raggedly, but he shook his head again. “No, this is a mistake somehow, Sister.” He turned to me. “Nicole, tell her. Help her try to make some sense of this. Tell her she is wrong.”

  But I stood frozen in place, wordless. Mildreth knew the whole truth—or her perception of the truth—and she was not mistaken in the facts. Julian was the father of the baby. Chloe would give birth at any time. And the child would be fully formed.

  For me to lie would be pointless. Within a day or two, Mildreth would be proven right.

  As he looked at me, my silence must have spoken volumes because all the color drained for Christophe’s face. “Nicole?”

  I couldn’t speak and he grabbed the back of a chair for support. “By the gods,” he whispered.

  “Christophe…” Julian began, sounding nervous now. “Surely, you can’t believe—”

  But he was cut off as Christophe whirled toward him.

  “Guards!” Christophe shouted.

  Within an instant, the young lieutenant and one of the house guards came running into the great hall.

  Christophe motioned to Julian. “Lock him up.”

  * * * *

  Chloe and I remained in her rooms for the next two days, as a kind of informal imprisonment. Meals were brought into us, but the servants hurried about their business, either depositing or retrieving trays and then leaving. A few times, I tried to gain news of what was happening outside, but no one would speak to us.

  Near the evening of the second day, Chloe went into labor.

  Upon entering with a meal tray, one of the serving girls saw what was happening and she left quickly. Soon, a few other women from the house came in carrying water, blankets, and towels. They remained to help me with the delivery and I was grateful for their help.

  Mildreth did not come.

  No hired midwife came. She was no longer necessary to Mildreth.

  For a first birth, the labor was not long and shortly after daybreak, Chloe gave birth to a fine son. I cut the cord and held him in my arms. He was perfect, with fingernails and a full head of red-blond hair. He looked like a tiny copy of my father and brother.

  One of the serving women slipped from the room.

  Normally, in a noble household, men were not allowed into a birthing chamber until all remnants of the painful, messy event had been completely cleared away. The new mother would be washed and dressed in a clean nightgown. Her hair would be brushed and she would be sitting up in bed, holding the freshly wrapped baby when her husband was finally allowed to enter.

  But this was not a normal birth and I was not surprised when the door opened and Mildreth walked in with Christophe behind her. There were bloody sheets and towels all over the floor. The cord and afterbirth still lay in a basin. Chloe still glistened from pain and perspiration.

  Mildreth walked over, took the child from me and laid him on the bed.

  Christophe came to the bed and looked down. His face was impassive, as if he felt nothing. The baby kicked a few times. Christophe took in the sight of his hair and well-developed arms and legs. This had not been a premature birth.

  Without a word, without even looking at Chloe or me, he turned and strode from the room. Mildreth followed him.

  “What do think will happen now?” I whispered.

  Chloe was silent for a moment and then she said, “I don’t know.”

  * * * *

  That afternoon, a serving girl put her head in the door and spoke to me. “His lordship wants to see you in the great hall.”


  Chloe was in the bed, holding the baby. After glancing at her once and seeing her eyes filled with fear, I left the room.

  The walk was long. By rights, Christophe could legally have Chloe strangled to death. It was a capital crime for a wife to secretly pass off an illegitimate son as a nobleman’s heir. Of course, Christophe would never go so far. He would not harm either of us, but this had played out in the worst of all possible ways, and I did not know how he would respond. Though Chloe had been a frightened, cornered girl seeking an escape from ruin, she now appeared every inch the deceiver.

  Upon reaching the main floor of the keep, I headed down the main passage and tried to gather myself before reaching the archways. When I passed through and entered the great hall, I found Christophe there alone, standing near the fire.

  I barely recognized him. All of the kindness I’d come to know was gone from his face, replaced by a hardness of depths I could not fathom. Walking across the hall, he stood close enough to tower over me. He was so tall that my eyes were level with his collarbones.

  “Did you just learn the truth upon arriving here with me?” he asked.

  With me.

  The words cut like knives, but I wouldn’t lie to him now. “No.”

  “Then how long have you known?”

  “Since before the wedding.”

  A sound of pain came from the back of his throat and he half-turned away. “And you worked with Chloe to betray me?”

  “No. Can’t you see she was trapped? She fell in love with the wrong man and he abandoned her.”

  “And you chose her over me?”

  How could he ask me that? “Christophe…she is my sister.”

  For some reason, that appeared the worst possible thing for me to say and he swung his head back toward me in a rage. “And I am more than your friend! I am more, Nicole! And you would have placed a Belledini as the heir to Whale’s Keep.” He staggered backward in disbelief. “You would have done this to me.”

  My heart was breaking—as everything he said was true—but I had never meant to hurt him, only to help Chloe.

  Wildly, I tried to think of some way to explain this when a commotion sounded from beyond the archway. A moment later, Julian was dragged in by a guard, with two other guards following. Julian appeared disheveled, wearing the same clothing from the last time he’d been in this hall.

  Christophe’s rage faded, replaced by the same look of hardness I’d seen upon walking in.

  “Congratulations,” he said. “You have a son.”

  Julian jerked his arm away from the guard. “And what do you propose now, de Fiore? Some kind of manly duel?”

  Perhaps I had overestimated his intelligence. Did he really think indignation would work here? And he wouldn’t last a minute in a duel with Christophe.

  “No.” Christophe shook his head. “But I’ve written a letter to Gideon Montagna. I’ve explained how you seduced his daughter, how you impregnated her, how you abandoned her, and then came here to try to blackmail her.”

  Julian went completely still.

  “If I were you,” Christophe went on, “I would not ever set foot on Montagna lands again unless you wish to be tied to a stake in the courtyard and horsewhipped. I think you can be safely assured there will be no further actions on the part of Lord Gideon to gain you a commission. And since you are no longer welcome here, you have nowhere to go but back to your own father. Perhaps he’ll take you in.”

  Julian’s expression grew panicked and he stepped forward. “Christophe, please—don’t send that letter. I cannot go to my father just yet. I’m in—I’m in a difficulty. The night of your wedding, I lost a hand of cards to Colonel Régnier, but there was more than money on the table. My father’s will states that I’ll inherit a vineyard on the west edge of our lands. I was out of funds and I had three aces in my hand. Three aces! I bet the vineyard and the colonel had four kings. How was I to know? I can’t be blamed for that. But the vineyard isn’t mine yet. I’ve been trying to raise the money to buy it back from the colonel, but if you send me home, he’ll seek me out there and my father will learn what I’ve done. Please, don’t send that letter to Gideon yet…or just let me stay here a few weeks. I’ll live in the barracks. You’ll never see me. I need a little time to raise the money.”

  Christophe didn’t bother to hide his disgust. “I sent the letter this morning.” He looked to the guards. “Take him down to the landing point and put him in a boat. Row him to shore and after that, he’s on his own. Just make sure he leaves. I don’t care which direction he goes.”

  All three guards moved forward and two of them grabbed Julian’s arms.

  “Christophe, wait!” Julian cried. “Listen to me.”

  But he was dragged from the hall and soon we could no longer hear him.

  Christophe and I were alone again.

  “What about us?” I asked.

  The hardness in his eyes only deepened. “I sent two letters to your father, one in reference to Belledini’s part in this and a second one in reference to yours and Chloe’s. I’ve told him of your deceit and how you planned this betrayal together. I will handle having the marriage dissolved and have a copy of the documents sent to him.” He paused. “I will give Lady Chloe time to recover from the birth and then my men will escort you both home. Your father can decide your fates from there. I want nothing more to do with either of you.”

  At this last sentence, the hardness in his voice was colored by pain and I felt as if I were breaking apart inside.

  “Oh, Christophe.”

  “Stay out of my sight until you leave.”

  * * * *

  I made my way back upstairs to Chloe and slipped inside her apartments. She sat on a low couch, still holding the baby.

  “Well?” she said, but her voice held fear.

  “He’s written to Father, telling him what we’ve done. As soon as you’re able to travel, we’ll be escorted home.”

  She shook her head as if not having heard me correctly. “What? That is my punishment? To be taken home?”

  I nodded, still feeling broken inside. “As soon as you can travel. Then he’ll have the marriage dissolved.”

  She leaned back on the couch, gripping the child. “What about the soldiers he sent to guard the Montagna shoreline? Will he withdraw them?”

  “I don’t know. He didn’t say.”

  “He said nothing about this at all?”

  “No.”

  How could she be so callous? Together, we had damaged a good man, possibly destroyed him.

  “And he’s providing us with an escort?” she asked, sounding incredulous.

  “Of course he is. Chloe, this is Christophe. He’d never put us on a road without guards.”

  She looked at me as if she thought me simple, as if she thought me a fool. But then she stood. “We’ll leave tomorrow.”

  “Tomorrow? Have you lost your senses? You’ll be bleeding for days. Think of the crossing to the shore. And you certainly can’t ride.”

  “I’ll be fine on the crossing and once on shore, I’ll have Captain Fáuvel arrange for a wagon. I can ride in the back.” The pale, frightened young woman was gone, but so was the serene young woman I had once known. She was someone else. “If Christophe is letting me go, I’m going home.” Her tone was fierce. “I’m bringing my son home to White Deer Lodge.”

  Chapter 11

  By dusk of the next day, Chloe, the baby, and I rolled into the courtyard of White Deer Lodge in the back of a wagon, surrounded by de Fiore guards. All around us stood the familiar log buildings and familiar pathways.

  Chloe closed her eyes and breathed in the air. “I’m home,” she whispered.

  I doubt anyone was expecting us, because Corporal Devon came walking up in surprise.

  “My ladies?”

  Chloe reached out for him and allow
ed him to lift her out of the wagon. Then she reached back for the baby. I couldn’t believe she was still on her feet, but she did not even seem weary. I climbed down behind her.

  “Where are my parents?” Chloe asked the corporal.

  “In the family dining room, my lady, about to begin supper.”

  “Good,” she answered. “That’s perfect. Please see that the de Fiore guards are given quarters and a decent meal. They will be heading back for Whale’s Keep tomorrow.”

  “Yes, my lady.”

  With that, she headed toward our second residence—and the dining room. How could she be in such a hurry to face Father? Christophe’s letter had most certainly already reached him, and I could only image what it had contained, how we had been portrayed. The two of us were coming home in more than just shame. I’d had all day to think more clearly and to worry a little less about Christophe and a little more about us. We had conspired to commit a capital offense and if Christophe chose to withdraw his soldiers, we would be responsible for the suffering of many of our own people.

  What would Father say? What would he do?

  But I followed Chloe as she strode into the dining room of our home.

  Father, Mother, and Erik were already seated. At the sight of us, Father and Erik both jumped to their feet, their eyes blazing.

  Chloe faced them without fear. “I am home.”

  No one spoke for a moment and then my father said raggedly, “You have brought nothing but shame upon your home.”

  Walking forward, Chloe laid the baby on the table and pulled back his blankets, completely exposing his small form. “Look at him,” she ordered. “Look at every inch of him.”

  In spite of themselves, both my father and Erik looked down and their expressions began to alter. They could not help but be affected by the sight of the healthy child with his blond-red hair, blue eyes, pale skin, and strong legs. Again…he was a tiny copy of them.

  “His name is Gideon Montagna,” Chloe said, “and he is a son of White Deer Lodge. Look at him and try to deny it.”

  At first, Father couldn’t take his gaze from the baby and when he raised his head, he appeared lost in thought.